It can be hard to explain. Sometimes it's just a feeling. For Robin and Sam, it began when they were dating in high school. They remember talking about wanting to help a child one day—a child who needed a family. Of course, they had no idea that one day their heart to help a child would lead them to a sixteen-year-old girl who would want them to adopt her baby.
Being sweethearts in high school turned into marriage and the beginning of a family of their own. Sam and Robin Bowling had three sons— Matthew, Timothy, and Thomas—who kept them busy and were the lights of their lives. But Robin couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to raise a daughter.
Sitting together and watching their sons play baseball, Robin and friend Sheryl Naylor were sharing small talk. Robin had been watching a group of little girls playing off to the side. She mused, "I would love to have a little girl."
Sheryl, who worked for Christian Adoption Services (CAS), instinctively said, "You can. What about adoption?"
"It was a path that Sam and I felt we had been on since when we dated," Robin confesses. "We decided we would adopt a baby—a little girl who needed a family."
Noelle thought her life was over. The junior in high school tried to keep her pregnancy a secret. But it was a secret that could not be kept from her parents. Unsure what to do, Noelle's mother sought help and learned about CAS. Caring CAS staff members outlined Noelle's options. Through their counsel, she made an adoption plan for her unborn child.
"Knowing that God was at the center of my decision was comforting," Noelle remembers. "My focus became what was best for my baby."
Children have questions and no answers. They may feel unloved or abandoned. Robin and Noelle joined together to keep that from happening to Olivia. Robin kept lines of communication between her and Noelle open. Bound together with a common purpose, Olivia never felt the stigma other adopted children know and she thrived.
Types of Adoption:
Open adoptions
Semi-open adoptions
Closed adoptions
In all three, only CAS approved waiting adoptive families are eligible. Open and semi-open adoptions afford the opportunity for the birth mom to choose the adoptive family. But in a semi-open adoption, identifying information such as address and phone numbers may not be shared. In this arrangement, CAS serves as the mediator for any contact.
The adoptive family in an open or semi-open adoption sends regular updates and pictures to the birth family and the birth mom can also send letters and special gifts—but is not obligated. In a closed adoption, a birth mom decides to not have contact with the adoptive family. The baby is placed with an approved waiting adoptive family CAS chooses. However, if at any time the birth mom decides to receive updates, she can.
Noelle entered into a semi-open adoption with the Bowlings. She had her baby girl the Wednesday before Thanksgiving 2003, and Robin and Sam brought Olivia home that Friday.
"We love Noelle," Robin says. "Sam and I knew the adoption was God's leading. We had peace from the beginning and we weren't afraid to show Noelle our love."
Robin wanted Olivia to know about her adoption and her "tummy mommy." She believed it was important she knew about her two families—and that both families loved her.
Robin knew Olivia needed to know her story directly from Noelle. Both hoped one day Olivia would decide to meet her birth mom. That day came on August 11, 2024. And the day after Thanksgiving, both families gathered at the Bowlings home, November 30, in Rocky Mount.
It was a dream come true for Noelle: "Our families together is like a big hug from God. Robin and Sam have been loving parents to Olivia. To be reunited is amazing. I would not change any of the decisions I made for Olivia."
Choosing adoption was the right choice for Noelle. Seeing Sam and Robin give Olivia a wonderful family life was what she had hoped for her baby girl. Knowing the Bowlings love her and wanted the best for her has been life changing.
To learn more about CAS's adoption services, visit www.christianadopt.org. CAS also has a no-cost, "confidential intermediary" service to assist CAS adoptees and birth families reunite when a child turns 18. For more information, call 704-847-0038.
Written by Jim Edminson, Editor of Charity & Children